Had an interesting social media situation recently, where I may have inadvertently offended someone. I’m not quite sure what to make of it, so I’m going to post about my side of it, keeping it all as anon as possible, out of respect for the other party.
Recently, I noticed a person I considered an online, kinky friend (we followed each other, and had interacted a number of occasions) give a small rant on social media. He spoke mostly disparaging of the foot/sock community for being selfish and maybe hinting about some invasion of privacy–or perhaps a form of online bullying. To be honest, the message was a bit cryptic to me, so I may be misinterpreting. But to me, it implied that some people has been hassling him for his own fetishes (mostly shoes). He also stated that he believed this behavior was destroying the fetish community. I was not singled out in any way, it seemed to be a general rant. He even mentioned the possibility of deleting his profile.
Now, I have to be honest… as far as I knew, I wasn’t aware of anything like this happening. That said, the foot/sock community is a large one, so it’s entirely possible he may have experienced some interactions that were quite negative to him that I had no knowledge of. So I actually reached out to him privately, asking him what had happened. And to my surprise, he actually blocked me without any sort of reply.
That was a bit of a shock. I haven’t done anything to offend him–at least, not knowingly. Maybe I’ve been misinterpreted? Or his own experiences were so negative, he didn’t want to discuss it? I really don’t know.
I’m not angry about it, but I am a bit mystified. And a bit hurt. But I mostly feel sorry that he feels this strongly about the matter when I’m not even able to discuss it with him. (Well, actually, I do have other ways to contact him, but if he made such a strong statement, I’ll respect it and not intrude, because I suspect that could only make things worse.)
I’m not sure if he’ll see this post, and if he did, how he’d feel about it (I tried to keep it as anon as possible). This is not to slam him in any way. I’m sure he had valid reasons for his actions… he’s an incredibly bright guy. But I did want to make at least a public message to raise two points.
- If anyone does have any awareness of any online fetish bullying, or invasion of privacy, or anything going on that may be splitting apart the foot/sock/shoe community, can it be shared with me? I’m sure I can’t solve it, but maybe we can at least have some discussion and awareness about it.
- If I, personally, have done anything to offend anyone, please let me know. I try very hard to be inclusive, and I have offended anyone, I’d like to know, so I can do what I can to right any wrongs I may have personally done.
It may all be a miscommunication. It’s actually happened with him and me once before, where he completely mistook something I said to him as offensive, when it was not meant that way at all. I suppose that’s the problem with online communication… what sounds one way on the writer’s end can have a very different meaning to the reader.
I did just feel I had to write something and, if he ever did see this, let him know I am sorry for anything that’s happened to him, and that I wish him the best.