Category: abuse

The Horrors!  Both real and kinky.

The Horrors! Both real and kinky.

Note:  With Halloween approaching, I thought it’d be fun to bring this back.  This is a repost from 2012, but it is one of my favorites, and I spent a lot of time creating it, so I’m presenting it again.



For Halloween, I take a bit of a gruesome look at some of the distant relatives of our kinks.  I’ve personally found it both interesting and fascinating to realize that so many of the kinky things we do to each other and nearly take for granted in the scene have a basis in genuine historical torture and execution techniques.  I’ve actually read up on a number of books on torture, and I’m suspecting many of you have at least a passing interest in it–even though the medieval stuff does go way further that I’d hope any of us would ever go in actual practice.

I present a few historical tortures, followed by the more modern counterparts that I see used in the kink scene today.  The parallels are quite impressive, and may serve as a reminder to why some of the “vanilla” people not into our scene can have such a strong response of disgust with what we do–they probably have some trouble differentiating then and now.  It’s also a matter of consent and safety (no permanent damage, in our case), but that’s often a bit difficult to explain to people not in the scene.

This is not for the weak of heart.  I hope you find it both disturbing and informative.

Pear of Anguish 

  • Medieval Torture: 

This would be shoved into the anus (or mouth) of an unwilling victim, and slowly opened until it tore the appropriate orifice apart.  If the mouth, it would shatter teeth and jawbones.

  • Modern Counterpart:


You can get your own at The Stockroom.  As they mention on their site, this item was also featured in their store on the first season of American Horror Story.  I suppose it could be used as a mouth gag, too, but with caution.

To be honest, this is not exactly a device I see commonly used amongst kinksters.  But at the same time, I thought the similarities between the medieval and the modern were pretty striking, so it seemed like a pretty good place to start.


  • Medieval Torture:


A more mild form of punishment, more typically used as public humiliation.  But it did allow the victim to be subject to whatever abuse the crowd would dish out:  throwing rocks, food, or fecal matter at them.  Occasionally, their earlobes would be nailed to the board.

If a pillory for feet, sometimes a fire would be built underneath, reducing their feet to charred stumps.  Alternatively, their bare feet would be coated with a salt solution, and a goat would be brought in to lick it off.  While it would result in initial laughter, over time, as the salt solution continues to be reapplied and repeated, the coarseness of the goat’s tongue would gradually abrade away their skin until bloody red–through the muscle, perhaps all the way down to the bone.

  • Modern Counterpart:



I’ve found it a bit tricky to find a reliable source of stocks.  There do seem to be a few independent vendors online, but I’ve never used them, so I can’t really speak for them.  Occasionally, you can find them on eBay.  This spreader bar, or steel stocks, seem to be the most readily available.  If anyone knows of a good source, please share your recommendations!


  • Medieval Torture:

Often, a victim would be hung up in the exposed air.  People would be allowed to swing the dangling cage, throw things (food, rocks, fecal matter), be helplessly exposed to the elements, and you’d often be given little to no food or water.  It was not uncommon to be left for days, weeks, or months–resulting in a slow, agonizing death.  After a person finally died, often the corpse would usually continue to be left up as a warning to others.

  • Modern Counterpart:



While there are body versions of cages out there, most kinksters today would probably be more likely to have a pup cage (if they can afford and have the space for it, lol).  But there are lots of other examples, such as this vertical cage.


  • Medieval Torture:

More of a humiliation tool, this device was typically used on women who gossiped too much.

  • Modern Counterpart:


You can get a similar version at Mr. S.  Not much difference, is there?  Some things just haven’t changed.

Lead Sprinkler

  • Medieval Torture:

This would be filled with molten lead, and then sprayed across a naked body.  Sometimes, as the victim was lying down, molten lead would be poured directly onto the eyes, burning out the lids and eyeballs, going down into the brain, resulting in incredible agony, and usually death.

  • Modern Counterpart:



Today, most of us like getting candle wax dripped on us.  Fortunately, candles can be found virtually anywhere, and are generally much safer than molten lead.  😉  One word of caution:  if I’m not mistaken, I believe it’s beeswax candles that burn at a much higher temperature, and can cause semi-severe burns if you’re not careful.  Also, I do believe some colors burn hotter than others, so check for that as well.

A generally well-known tip:  if you hold the candle higher up, the wax will have a bit of time to cool as it drips down.  The closer to the body, the hotter it will be.  To save a bit on cleaning, or if you’re a bit nervous about trying candle wax, you can wrap the body in Saran Wrap.  It’ll dilute the effects, and is much easier to clean up afterwards.  Well, off the body, anyway.  A lot of will inevitably end up on the bed, so have a cloth, blanket, or more saran wrap underneath to catch anything that drips off.


  • Medieval Torture:

Sort of speaks for itself.  As a pure torture technique, it wasn’t uncommon to have knots at the end of whip, or steel fishing hooks that would rip apart the flesh with each stroke.

  • Modern Counterpart:


As for me personally, I’m not as into the idea of flogging/whipping.  That said, I’ve never tried it, either.  I’d maybe be up for trying it at the hand of someone with experience.  A good variety of floggers can be found here, and I’m sure many readers will know of other sources.  There’s endless styles, with different levels of intensity.  Unfortunately, this is not my area of expertise.


  • Medieval Torture:

In medieval times, you would crush thumbs, knees, or even worse, your head.  To the point that bones would shatter, and limbs and muscles would be torn apart.   With the head, your teeth would literally grind together to dust, your jawbone would shatter, and your eyeballs would pop out.  The process could be stretched out over hours or even days.

  • Modern Counterpart:




Nowadays, we like to crush balls and tits the most.  Lots of different kinds and styles out there, each with their own unique kick.

*     *     *

Hope you all found this informative.  It’s a bit sobering to see that our kinks and genuine torture techniques are not that far apart.  It’s all a matter of consent, and knowing when to draw the line.  This is why it’s always best to play safe.  We do often hear of people who have died in our community, usually from unassisted breath play.  Never do breath play alone!  And always have an emergency safety plan in place.  Safety scissors, to quickly cut rope but not skin, are a great start.  And Doms/Masters/Tops should keep a close eye on their subs/slaves/bottoms to make sure they’re not uncomfortable or in pain that’s out of their limits.  And of course, safety words.

While I did link to the same site for the medieval torture, much of my info actually came from the books The Big Book of Pain by Mark P. Donnelly & Daniel Diehl, and The History of Torture by Brian Innes.  Both are fascinating reads.

TFG Tips:  My nipple play techniques

TFG Tips: My nipple play techniques

My husband is one whose nips are hard wired to his cock.  Fortunately for him, I seem to never get tired playing with tits.  He likes some fairly intense play, and when I’ve done scenes with others, many have commented that my nipple play can be quite intense.  I thought I’d share a few of my techniques.

My husband is camera shy, so I’m demonstrating with a wooden dowel.  Not as sexy, but on the other hand, it does allow to see from a good angle.

  1.  It’s not what you do, it’s how you do it.  When one thinks of nipple play with hands, obviously, one’s first instinct is to pinch between the thumb and forefinger–which is fine (although I feel there is a better way below).  One secret is to add as much variety as possible: 
  • Pinch in rhythms… both random and in patterns. 
  • Or keep a long, sustained squeeze that doesn’t let up.  Alternately, maybe let up gradually, only to suddenly get intense. 
  • With two nips, the tendency is to squeeze both the same… but you can play with each one in different patterns.
  • Change the angle.  If you’ve pinching them flat, release them, then pinch them vertically.  And don’t forget diagonally/45 degree angles!

In addition to pinching and squeezing, don’t forget to add tugging/pulling, and twisting.  Using the first two fingers and thumb is ideal for both.

Twist and twirl… although check in with you sub to make sure he’s responding to it positively.

2.  There’s something better than fingers.  My favorite technique, and the one that gets the most response from my husband, is when I squeeze his nipples between my knuckles.  Using the first knuckle tends to be a bit more gentle, but if you use the second knuckle, the intensity amps up.  I’ve also found it seems easier to control when using the knuckles to pinch, especially the second knuckle.

Pinching the nipple between the first knuckles.
Pinching the nipple between the second knuckles.

Keep in mind all the varieties mentioned above:  pinch in rhythms, patterns, random, sustained, and tug. But in addition:

  • You can knead them, like a ball of clay or dough trying to make a ball.  If the nipples are small, that may be more difficult, but my husband’s nipples are on the larger side, so they are ripe for kneading… and his moans indicate his enjoys it a lot.
  • Rub them back forth, as if rolling or twirling them.
  • It’s so important, I’m going to state it again:  Change the angle.  If you’ve pinching them flat, release them, then pinch them vertically.  And don’t forget diagonally/45 degree angles.  It seems even more effective with knuckle pinching.

3.  Less is more.  The other best tip:  sometimes releasing them and giving them a rest period makes the next time you play with them even more sensitive.  Between my nip abuse, I often will massage them by pressing my thumbs into them and rubbing, or running the backs of my fingernails back and forth across them rapidly.  Having a rest period lets the blood seep back into them, meaning any future work will feel even more intense with less effort, as they will be more sensitive.  Pacing can be everything.

4.  Fun with clamps.  Obviously, using tit clamps is an option.  Some fun you can have with clamps:

  • Pull on the chain (if connected).  Pull at various angles: out, down, up.
  • Add weights to the chain.  Standard sized padlocks are ideal.
  • Connect the chain to something.  One of the most intense experiences my husband told me I did to him is once I had him tied standing up, facing a pole.  And I put the tit clamps around the pole, so if he leaned back, it’d only pull them harder.  They can also be connected to a gag or a chest harness.
  • Pull them with a vibrator, such as a Hitachi Magic Wand.  Or put the vibrator right on the tits, clamped or not!
  • As stated above, take them off from time to time, let them rest, then reapply them.  Preferably at a different angle.  Really, this can create more intensity than just leaving them on for an extended period.  Trust me.

Keep in mind that tolerance will vary from person to person, so be watching the sub carefully for their response and/or check in with them from time to time and see what they’ve enjoyed the most (and least!).   Some can take a lot, and some not as much.

Hope that gives you some ideas!  I have an entire tag on my blog called “tips” if you want to see other ideas I have or have run across over the years.  It’s a small list so far, but I’m hoping to increase it!  And if you have other ideas for creative nipple abuse, let me know!