So as you can see based on my TFG’s sub meets, I’ve meet up with a number of guys. Most of them were because of my Recon profile (under the same name). And very often, in the course of chatting with a guy on Recon trying to set up a meet, they will often ask for a face pic.
I have it explicitly stated on my profile that I don’t share face pics online. I have a life situation where if my kinky side were recognized publicly, it could have a very negative impact on me. A single kinky session is just not worth the risk for me. If I’m wanting to meet with someone for a scene and they want to see me first, I am willing to meet them in a public location beforehand, or give references of people who have met me.
Some will say that’s a deal breaker. And I do understand that–I have no issue with people who feel this way. An in-person session is a very physical thing, and if there’s not a certain physical attraction, they don’t want to waste their time. Some also view it with a wary eye, as if I have something to hide. Physically speaking I don’t, and in fact, I’ve been told by multiple people when we met that I’m rather handsome. (Blush.) But I choose to keep my kinky side and personal side separate, and that means I can’t show a face pic. It’s also out out my respect to my husband, who chooses to remain very private as well.
The frustration I do have is this… more than once, I have chatted with someone on Recon. Often rather extensively. To the point where we are about to schedule an actual meet. And that’s when they ask for a face pic. And when I say I don’t share, they just disappear. And I think, “Didn’t you read my profile? We could’ve avoided this entire waste of time conversation right away.”
Often I’ll admit, they’re just not reading my profile. Maybe I just need to make it the number one item in my profile, so it’s more upfront.
But I also think maybe sometimes people may think that after talking a bit, I’ll change my mind. I can say this… it all the online interactions I’ve had, over Recon, email, twitter, tumblr, text, etc., I have only sent out my face pic 4 times. And all times, it was to people I had talked to consistently for years before I finally did so (or, in one exception, has an excellent track record and known reputation). It’s not something I do lightly.
I have noticed it tends to be younger people who have the “Must have a face pic” attitude. It would figure. They’re grown up on social media, where everyone shares everything. It sort of bugs me whey they say “it’s 2017, show your face”. But most of them also don’t have decades of careers or life partners that would be at risk. They’re only thinking of themselves in the now, and not the lives of the people around them. I think most older guys get this. One day, the young guys will figure it out.