If you’ve noticed, I’ve recently been reposting quite a few of my older meets here on my blog. There’s two reasons for this: one, after having been doing this for well over a decade, it’s nice to see some older scenes get some additional recognition. Even I sometimes say to myself, “Oh, I forgot about this one!” when I go through old posts.
But the main reason is that I frankly just haven’t had nearly as much time for meets. If you recall, I generally only meet with people when my husband goes out of town (not to go behind his back, but to instead prioritize him when he’s here in town). Well, ever since the pandemic, his travel has been severely cut back. Where he was out of town 1-2 times a month, he’s now maybe out of town once every 2-3 months.
But somewhat recently, he was out of town for two nights… so I thought it would be a nice opportunity to get to have a scene again. I try to mix it up with people I’ve meet with before and have enjoyed, and also try to meet some new people I haven’t worked with before.
As it turned out, at lot of my returning meets weren’t available. So I turned mostly to people I haven’t yet met before… which is always a bit risky, because you never know if they’ll going to flake or not. For that reason, I often will hedge my bets and set up with multiple people (letting them know I won’t know for sure until the last minute), and see what works out.
As it turned out, I had tentative meet with a 19 yo twink Wednesday. He seemed quite eager, communicated a lot, and was ready to meet on the following Monday, so I got a hotel room ready (I don’t meet at my place for privacy reasons–and ease of clean up, haha). And, of course, right after this, he ghosted.
I also chatted with a few guys on Recon, and two seemed equally promising. Two of them had to cancel as well, but it sounded more legit, and they did give me a day or two notice–so I wasn’t upset at that or them. Two other Recon meets stepped in, but one also ghosted me, and the other canceled at the last minute without much explanation.
Which basically means I had 5 possible meets all set up, and every one of them flaked, and now I had a hotel room I had already paid for and no one to meet with. Fortunately, another former meet was down for an impromptu short scene, so it didn’t go to total waste.
Still, it does show some of the difficulty and frustrations getting meets set up in the first place. And I’ve heard stories from other people too, where similar things happen. It’s one of the risks I take, and I often go into situations like this knowing this is a possibility. Honestly, it’s not the first time it’s happened. At the same time, it’s not super common either, as I usually have a better track record of talking with people for a while before we meet, so I can get a sense of how reliable they are (and it was two people like that who gave a reasonable timeline and reasons).
Setting up multiple meets simultaneously is not an ideal situation. But I’ve also had enough experience to know that schedules don’t always work out. I just really hate the wasted opportunities, especially since I probably won’t have one again for a while.
