Maybe TOO degrading?

So I have run into this video before a few times (mainly back in the tumblr days). I don’t know anything about it’s origins–I doubt it’s owned by whoever tweeted it below–and assuming it’s consensual, it’s generally pretty hot if you’re into verbal humiliation and degradation, especially using the gay “f” word. If not, the vid below may not be your cup of tea. But even so, I do have some other problems with it. (It does not feature any nudity at all.)

I won’t lie, I now greatly enjoyed using the gay “f” word in the context of a consensual verbal scene. It wasn’t an easy word for me to initially use (I’ve posted my thoughts and struggles about using it–first discussed it back in 2012, with many follow ups in Jan 2014, June 2014, and April 2015), and not all subs are into it. But I now use it quite frequently, especially in cyber play–but also in real life meets as well (again, assuming the sub is into it–I have run into a few that are not, and I will respect that).

That said, even within the context of a scene, I have a different reaction to calling (or in this case, having the sub call himself) “stupid”, “dumb”, or a “ret*rd”. There’s just something about that that really rubs me the wrong way.

To me, a sub is many things, but not stupid or dumb. And I personally can’t imagine a scene where anyone would really want to be called that, even in a role play scenario. It doesn’t indicate subservience that the gay “f” word can at least imply in the right context… it’s just insulting for no reason.

Really, a scene should always be a two way street, and if the Dom really feels he’s playing with a “stupid” sub, maybe he shouldn’t be playing at all.

I guess there always could be that one specific role play situation where the sub honestly enjoys it. And if it’s truly what the sub wants, I guess that’s fine. But I don’t think I could do it, even if asked. Am I alone in that thought?